Sex offenders... who are the victims?

There has been a lot going on in the news with regards to child pornography.  It is definitely on the rise.  Just in the last 2 weeks, there have been at least 2 cases happen locally to me.  This definitely seems higher than it used to be, when this was a thing that was rarely ever discussed.  Now, it is unfortunately, a reality, and to top it off, a lot of pedophiles feel that THEY are the victim because of the Sex Offender Registration and Notification Act (SORNA) and mandatory minimum sentences.  There are people who justify hebephilia (attraction to pubescent kids) because it is a natural instinct (as it is in nature when as soon as animals are able to reproduce, they do for survival).

Now, the real question is?  Are these people right?  Are they the victims of nature?

First of all, I will admit that I type this with a certain degree of bias.  I hate anyone who victimizes a child in any way, shape, or form.  I have a strong dislike towards people who abuse children, because I feel children are innocent and their whole lives become negatively affected by abuse sustained on them.  As I was a victim of child abuse (physical and mental), I can tell you that I was permanently affected by it.  Having never been sexually abused, I can not say that "I've been there," or that "I know what that is like," but I can say that abuse has long lasting effects that can potentially last a life time to get over.

So, I will always lean towards the victim being the child.

Now, let's get to the bottom of why sex offenders feel they are the victims.  The sex offender registry was created to notify people when sex offenders are moving next to them.  It is also there to notify potential homeowners of how many sex offenders live in their future neighborhood.  The sex offender registry was created to inform people for the safety of their children.  That's pretty much it.  Any use of that list beyond that purpose is actually considered a felony.

But people out there have used the list for more nefarious purposes.  They have done things like committing acts of violence against sex offenders, harassing them relentlessly, vandalizing their property, and killing them.  These people believe that they are making the world a better place by doing this.  This is debatable, as I feel people who commit heinous crimes against children, should meet the capital punishment system.

Some of the offenses don't even seem that severe (for instance, a 15 and a 17 year old dating and then the 17 year old turns 18 and is suddenly a sex offender because the 15 year old's parents do not approve).  There have been people who falsely have had people arrested just because they had a disagreement and falsely claimed their kids have been molested.  These are people who get tied into the sex offender registry as well, and they are demonized for it.

There are a lot of people who believe that hebephilia is normal, and it is natural.  It was going to be categorized as a DSM-V mental illness, and there was an uproar about it.  They argued that being attracted to pubescent kids is "normal, and natural."  To an extent, I can see their point of view: from a strictly biological standpoint.  People younger than the age of 20, tend to be the most fertile, and have higher levels of hormones.  In the wild, animals mate as soon as they are able.  So, it may seem like a natural instinct to be attracted to younger people.  However, as human beings, we are more sophisticated (at least we should be).  We have emotions, we have feelings.  We are not "wild" or "feral" creatures.  We have a complex social structure.  We, as humans, generally understand that kids do not fully understand the consequences of their actions.  Adolescents do not fully comprehend the extent of their actions when they consent, or when they are abused.  Full brain development doesn't stop until 30.  The younger they are, the less they understand the consequences of their actions.  The younger they are, the less they understand that having sex has long term emotional consequences beyond the risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.  They don't understand what it means to have innocence and then not have it any more.  They don't understand that the way they feel about themselves changes when they give up their innocence.

Victims of abuse, do not understand this because they aren't developed enough to do so.  Just imagine what this means for the victim of child rape, who at the age of 2-3 was victimized, photographed, and raped for the pleasure of a disgraced Fire Chief and other perverts out there.  This is a child whose innocence was taken away at such a young age, she will NEVER have innocence.  It is actually remarkable how young people can remember things like this.  This is a girl whose life is PERMANENTLY affected by this.  She may have a normal childhood... but this is permanent.

So, who are the victims???  While most sex offenders typically feel they are the victims due to the sex offender registry, I really have to disagree.  A sex offender may have ruined his/her life in the process, but he/she ruined the life of someone else as well.  That sex offender ruined the innocence of a child.  A child who is learning at a vastly accelerated rate to an older person due to brain development.  This is a person, who is learning at a young age, the horrors of humanity.  A person who should be learning about math, science, and how to enjoy life, is learning about monsters with cameras and perverted intentions.

The victims of abuse are ALWAYS the children.

What are your opinions on this hot topic?  Do you agree, disagree?  As always, feel free to comment with your opinion.

Video games good or bad???

Well, I saw an interesting article put out by the American Psychological Association talking about how video games are the opposite of depression in terms of neurologically speaking. (I will post the article below).  It talks about how playing video games is a good way to fight depression (or manage it at least).  It talks about how playing video games hyperstimulates the areas of the brain that depression causes to become understimulated (the hippocampus and the reward pathways).  It also mentions that playing games to just escape reality in the long-term is bad because it causes people to not deal with their problems (causing social isolation, etc).

Now, personally, I am a gamer.  I play A LOT of video games.  And I will admit that when I was younger, I DID play with that escapist attitude.  I hated my life back then.  When I was a kid, I was abused at home (phyiscally and emotionally).  There was also neglect (be denied food, toilet paper, showers, etc).  I had been called worthless so many times, I believed it.

Now, my parents were divorced.  So, on the weekends, my dad, would pick us up to go to his house.  We had a NES there, and eventually a SNES.  And I played video games whenever I could there.  It was my escape from reality.  My only time I really cared about anything at all.  Games were a way to get away from everything that was going wrong.  I didn't think about how I would have to go back home... I didn't think about how I was going to have to face the bullies Monday morning... all I thought about was the game on the screen and the controller in my hands.  That was happiness for me back then.

Fast forward to the present.  I still play video games, and I still love doing it. :)  But, the reasoning behind it has changed.  I no longer feel the need to escape my life, because I'm working and living as well.  Video games have settled into the role they are supposed to be... a hobby.

However, there are people who think video games are bad.  Well, with the proper mind set, video games are GOOD, but with the wrong mind set, yes they can be bad.

People claim that video games cause irresponsible and violent behavior in kids.  Again, I must disagree.  Video games in the hands of the young and impressionable are something that DOES need to be moderated.  There are games that shouldn't be played by the young, and there are games that really SHOULDN'T be played AT ALL.  But most games are good games.  For instance:

• Ace Attorney series - These games really boost your logic and deductive reasoning skills.  You find contractions in witness testimonies.
• Any game that requires dodging bullets (Gradius series, Metal Slug series, Contra series to name a few) - These games really emphasize quick reaction times.  Games like this test your ability to think quickly and helps with making split decisions.  Games like this also boost reaction times (meaning you'll slam on the brakes quicker if a deer jumps in front of you).
• Platforming games boost memorization skills (as you remember how you made that jump or got past that area).
• Tetris, Dr. Mario, etc boost spatial reasoning, as you are dealing with falling patterns and must fit them appropriately to keep playing.  You have to recognize what the pattern looks like flipped, etc.
• Brain Age series tests your "executive functions."

With games like this, you'll find that as you play them, you get better and advance farther.  Most games test your memorization skills, and getting better each play through is proof of that.  Dedication and resiliance are tested when you lose and you try again.  (In fact, the more you try to beat a level that is just giving you a tough time, the more determined you prove yourself to be.)  A person is more likely to succeed in life in general with more dedication.

So, it is time to stop blaming video games on violent and irresponsible adolescents.  In today's world, parents spend less time with their kids.  The kids are either on social media, hanging out with the wrong crowds, etc.  Parents are now both working to make ends meet.  And yes, that makes for a very distance relationship between the kids and the parents.  THIS is a huge problem in terms of being a good influence on your kids.  Missed opportunities like this = more violent and irresponsible adolescents.  Parents who make their kids feel hated or worthless, or who aren't there when their kids need someone to talk to, are parents who have kids who begin to act out.  And acting out can include things like commiting suicide, fighting in school, committing crimes, etc.  A lot of it is a cry out for attention (even though it'll never be admitted).

Parents will need to figure out a way to connect with their kids.  Devise some way to ensure that the technology is turned off and there is time for actual communication.  Parents need to be attentive to their kids.  They should be able to figure out that something is wrong if something is different in the way they act or communicate.  Parents should be able to read their kids like a book.  Not in today's age.  In today's age, there is a decent chunk of parents who could admit that they don't really know their kid any more.  That is not a good thing.  If the kids don't know you any more, then who are they going to look up to?

So, video games are a good thing if played for the right reason, but it is important to actually spend time in reality as well.  If you have parents who love you, then put the tech away for a while and actually talk to them.  It would feel good to know that you have people who love you and want the best for you.  They may be annoying, but they are the only parents you'll ever have.  Parents, you need to pay attention to your kids (teens included).  They may be trying to find their independence, but you need to let them know that you have their back, no matter what.  Let them know that you still want to be there for them, and continuously communicate with them.  And yes, life will get in the way, but just don't let it get in the way too much.  Same with games.  Games are good, just don't let them get in the way of life.  Actually spend some time living, game responsibly, and talk to people.  Gaming can be a wonderful hobby to any active lifestyle. :)

Check out this link on this article I mentioned:
How Video Games Can Teach Your Brain to Fight Depression